vocation vacation

steve jobs, you got a hold on me. i find myself continually reading and referencing his iconic speech this week. while fully reflecting on its meaning. and my life purpose. add this to a mini makeover weekend and an old friend finding her way, and my mind is on a vocation vacation.

i am twenty-five years old. and i have no idea what i want to be when i grow up. sure, i could do this for the rest of my life and be satisfied [as long as my personal life continues to stir up some fire in my heart.]. i could. but right now, i just don't know if i want to. i see people that are so acutely aware of their vocation, their purpose in life, their passion... and it makes my heart hurt. for me [selfish sally here]. but, i don't know how to change it.

you're absolutely correct.. i don't know what my life will look like in one year, five years, ten years. so maybe this is the right path. but, maybe it's not. do you just keep chugging along and force fulfillment? or do you take a turn onto the bumpy, unknown road and try something else? right now my car in stalled in i-just-don't-know land. 

are my expectations too high? unrealistic? is the sky really the limit?

i want to be creative. i want to write. i want to design. i want to organize. i want to plan. i want to help. i want to evoke happiness. i want to inspire. i want to change the world.

but, maybe it's not about me.

maybe it's about a bigger plan. a bigger purpose. a universal need. maybe.

here's hoping there are some big, green road signs in my near future.